“…she laughs at the time to come.”
I have had a very full few weeks. Writing and teaching and planning and erranding and scheduling and don’t-forgetting. I’m tired.
I found myself feeling stressed and overwhelmed, falling back into the habit of “how can I keep up with this” thought.
Now. There is such a thing as being overcommitted and over-scheduled, taking on more than God has given us to do. It’s a constant fight to avoid this, even more as the kids are getting old enough to have their own schedules and lives. But this was something different. This was vague overwhelm stress that says, “I don’t have enough time to get to all of this” when the ‘all of this’ were things I knew I must do, am called to do, spread over months of time. I was foreshortening months of daily tasks into an overwhelming list and judging my capacity to tackle them by this day’s energy and time.
The Holy Spirit whispered to my heart yesterday that I was living in a scarcity mindset. “I don’t have enough time” or “I won’t have enough time” is a lie when doing what He has given me to do. Scarcity mindset comes when I’m living in my own strength- because then, I won’t have enough left in the tank to finish this race. But in Him, it’s always enough.
He provides time. He provides energy. He provides resources. Not ahead of time- because then I start resting in my own reserves and feeling in control. He gives DAILY bread, not weekly or monthly- not a warehouse-store-supply.
Morning by morning new mercies I see. All I need to do is faithfully do what He has given me to do right now, today. He holds my tomorrow. I can leave it in His hands. I can laugh at the future and know that God who was faithful yesterday will be faithful tomorrow and the day after and the day after that. He will keep filling me up as I pour myself out, and that happens one day, one hour at a time.
He is ever, abundantly, superfluously enough. And that brings relief that makes my heart laugh.