#fostercareexitinterview, Part the 3rd.
Flashback to 2013- when we were in the licensure process and blissfully unaware of what lay ahead. In our very first foster training, a chipper woman next to us turned and asked, “So, why do you guys want to be foster parents?” We looked at one another and laughed, and said in unison the answer she did not expect- “We don’t!”
Stepping into foster care was an act of obedience from day one. We did not want this. We were afraid of this. But in a million little ways, the Lord had made clear - to both of us - that this is what He was calling us to do. And so, there we were.
Through the years, that call is what kept us going. Through all of the grieving (there was a lot of grieving) and anger (there was a lot of anger) and injustice (there was a lot of injustice), we knew He had called us and had not yet released us. Even when I so desperately wanted to be done and walk away in 2018, with a very valid and compelling list of reasons why we should be done, N knew God hadn’t released us- and deep down, I did too. I was so weary. And afraid. But I knew. And so we kept on- and God, in His good way, brought us T to be our daughter forever.
So why are we done now? The short answer is- we both feel at peace that God has released us from this. There are a lot of factors in that, including the needs of our current children who would feel the impact of fostering differently in this stage of life. But if God called us, we would go- it would be a hard yes, but we would go.
We did not foster because we were especially heroic or strong or loving or compassionate. We fostered because that was the specific good work God had prepared in advance for us to do (Eph 2:10). He doesn’t call you and me to the same good works. And He didn’t call me to rescue all of the children of the world. He had specific good works that He prepared for me in advance. He worked in me that I would will and work for His good pleasure (Phil 2:13). We don’t get the credit, and we also don’t carry the weight of the whole child welfare system on our shoulders. We are simply called to respond when He calls us.
That’s all. Simply obedience.